I Need Their / They're / Therapy

So, I’m(Patrick) the lone member of Modern Industry who is currently single. Everyone else is either married or in a long term, committed relationship. Lame, I know. After playing third wheel for about 10 straight weekends, I decided to start dating again.

For someone who has been out of “The Game” (I feel like such a tool just typing that.) for a while, this is easier said than done. I  spend the majority of my time with three dudes in the sweat induced haze that is the Modern Industry workshop. Don’t get me wrong, I love the work that we do. It’s just not the ideal situation to be in if you’re trying to meet the ladies.

Obviously, I needed to change that. So let’s look at the options. Well, I could go out to bars and try to meet women. No. That’s never been my thing. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve met women in bars before, just rarely when I’m actually trying to do so. Plus, I’m not looking for a one night stand here.

What are my other options? I could join some kind of social club, join a gym, or... wait for it... try my hand at online dating. I have nothing against online dating. I have many friends who have met amazing people online. I also have a roommate who is obsessed with MTV’s Catfish. So, there’s that.

My real apprehension with online dating was that I would treat it like I do most other online communities. I would sta... err.. I mean.. observe, but rarely interact. It would occupy a huge amount of time and I wouldn’t actually meet anyone.

Thankfully, the decision was taken out of my hands. I had a friend who was spending inordinate of time online dating. He wanted some camaraderie and was very persistent and aggressive about it. After a few weeks of being pestered, I started to expect strange women to start showing up at my house. Either that, or I would make plans to meet him for a drink only to be accosted by a stranger when I walked into the bar. A little creeped out and worried about what he would do, I took the plunge.

I dove in head first. Behaving like a typical dude, I wrote a really boring, fact based profile and started sending terrible messages to all of the women. I don’t mean many women. I mean all of them. Surprisingly, this actually elicited some responses that led to dates. Best of all, I wasn’t emotionally invested at all so I was totally confident when I met them. Or so I thought. For about a month, I felt pretty awesome. Then I felt exhausted and emotionally drained. I realized that I have no desire to be a serial dater. It may work for some, but it’s not for me.

Now, fast forward a few months. I am a huge fan of the band/person Into It. Over It. He is apparently part of the so called “emo revival” that’s been happening for the past few years. I have to say I’m with Jaded Punk on this one. There is no emo revival. You just stopped paying attention... and the bands like My Chemical Romance that you called emo were not emo. Ever.

Anyway, I was scrolling through my Facebook feed and saw a post from Into It. Over It. that read:

Their / They're / There California tour starts tomorrow in Los Angeles at The Echo! SEE YA THERE?

Now, I had heard of this band before, but I had never really paid much attention. So, I took a trip down the black hole of the internet to find out more. Here is what I found.

Their / They're / There is a three piece supergroup of sorts. I mean, if you can consider a band made up of musicians from bands most people have never heard of a supergroup. They are fronted by bass player Evan Weiss AKA Into it. Over it. (Check them out. They are awesome.). Guitar is played by Matthew Frank of a Loose Lips Sink Ships. That name just makes me think of the old Hit the Lights song. It could just be me. On drums, we have Mike Kinsella of every emo/indie band to come out of the state of Illinois in the past 20 years. Seriously, dude was in The One Up Downstairs, Owls, Joan of Arc, Cap’n Jazz, and American Football. Oh, and Owen is his prolific solo project. You may have heard of it.

Like I said, Their / They're / There is a supergroup of people in bands most of America has never heard of. They are essentially a wet dream for the guys at Pitchfork. Don’t get me wrong. These guys are incredibly talented musicians and together they put out great music.


So, what the hell do these guys sound like? That’s not an easy question to answer. Weiss vocals sound similar to the pop-emo sound of his band Into It. Over It. Musically, not so much. According to Rolling Stone, Their / They're / There has a song that is Ska Metal. This makes no sense to me.

I was having trouble putting my finger on it, so I took a poll of the guys at Modern Industry. Taylor, our resident metal head, classified them as post rock for people with short attention spans (Their songs hover around the 3.5 minute mark.). Mike called them Post-Pop Punk. In some ways, I think those analyses make sense. You could also throw around the terms indie, math rock, and emo. You wouldn’t be wrong, but you wouldn’t really be right either. I’m not saying Their / They're / There has some kind of groundbreaking sound, but they are unique. Their sound is familiar, but all their own and they are really good at it.

Pretty impressed by what I hear, I decided to go to this show. Alone. I entered and walked through the L-Shaped outdoor patio filled with picnic tables. As you walk around the corner towards the entrance to the venue, you see a window to the kitchen where you can order amazing food that you’ve selected from a menu handwritten on a large chalkboard. I got the tater-tots. I was hungry and had already had a beer or two. This was a preventative measure.

I’m walking through the patio and I start to notice a few really attractive women looking at me. I was starting to feel pretty good about myself. Then, I realized they weren’t looking at me in a “I want him.” kind of way. They were looking at me in a “How do I know that guy?” kind of way.     

Then it dawned on me, these were all women I have either interacted with or seen on OKCupid. By the end of the night, I counted at least 8 women at this show that I was familiar with because of the site. Two I had actually gone out with. Three I had interacted with online. And three that I just recognized from the site.   

I am not trying to brag. It was just weird. Honestly don’t think anything like this has happened to me since I was about 22 at a bar in either Blacksburg or Richmond. If I actually were the kind of ladies man this may depict, I would have talked to at least one of them. I didn’t. I did however exchange numerous awkward glances and stood in my usual corner at the front of the stage. I know, I’m pretty awesome.

More than anything, I was just disappointed. Not in myself (Well, maybe a little.), but in the fact that I had no idea that most of these women were into music that I liked. Obviously, that’s kind of a big deal to me. I wonder if it will be awkward if I message these girls now. Especially after this blog post goes live. I think that’s what I’ll do.

Back to the point. If you’re a dude and you’re on the fence about Their / They're / There you should at least go to a show. Apparently, their following includes many single, attractive women. If nothing else, you will have a nice view. If you’re a woman, you should have come over and started a conversation with me on Wednesday. What the hell?



Most of the music in the genre’s I previously mentioned are a little bit slower. For me, seeing those bands can be fun, but only if I know most of the music pretty well. Otherwise it’s just boring. Not the case with Their / They're / There. Their music is energetic and rocking. This makes for a really great show.

Because all three have great stage presence, they can get a crowd moving. Even a crowd that didn’t really know their music that well, as was the case at Thee Parkside. You can’t really blame anyone for that. Their / They're / There has put out two EPs. Both came out last year.

In total, they have released 9 song. Most of which to change tempo unexpectedly throughout. This has the effect of creating an energy that bands are usually only able to create during a live performance. It’s kind of like that old Boxcar Racer album, but without the annoying volume changes.

Because they were headlining... and only have 9 songs... Their / They're / There extended their set by including covers of songs by Superdrag, Superchunk and the Lemonheads. I mean, who doesn’t cover Superdrag?

While this was welcome and embraced by the crowd, their set still seemed a little short for me. It would have been interesting to see them play a rendition of a song from each of the members other bands. I can completely understand why they wouldn’t want to do that, but it would have been awesome for the crowd.

All things considered, the duration of the set was really my only complaint. They put on a really good show. You should check out their music and go see them the next time they come to your town. Their / They're / There is a side project, so, you never know if you’ll get the chance again.

As for my dating life, well that’s probably fucked. But, if you are one of those cute single ladies who attended the They're/Their/There show at Thee Parkside, you should get in touch. My phone number is 757.....

Now go buy a bag, you jerks.



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